Phoenix Jones is a Real-Life Superhero...Minus the Super and the Hero.

Spiderman. Batman. Superman. Phoenix Jones. Yeah, for real. There is a guy, and from the reports I've heard, potentially a group of guys, fighting crime on the streets of Seattle. And, needless to say, it isn't going very well. Phoenix Jones recently had his nose busted after trying to break up a fight between two dudes. He also had a gun held to his head and was taunted by some hoodlums. Oddly enough, I can associate with the gun-to-the-head thing from when I was 'jumped' (as we used to call it) by a small town gang when I was about 15. I don't have to tell you that it's not a fun thing to experience.

Regardless, I have mixed emotions about Phoenix Jones. I was a comic book kid, and I still love that stuff now in my 30s, especially the Hollywood adaptations, so on one hand, I love this guy. As Seinfeld said, 'Every man thinks of himself as a low-level superhero'. Damn straight, Jerry. My fiancé just bought me Superman boxer-briefs, and my response was 'I'm going to need another 12 pairs of these.' I'm also frankly shocked that it took this long for someone to try and pull this off. On the other hand, this guy obviously took watching Kick-Ass way too seriously. 

Lastly, this guy is an idiot...but I think most every man will secretly respect him and, perhaps, even be jealous of his courage, even if it is bordering on psychotic. Phoenix Jones, you may not be a Hero or very Super, but you can take a bullet for me any day. ~ p

Funny and Odd Google Search Results

So, remember, these Google search results are 'learned' from what the majority of other people look up. ~ p

Funny Friday: Cats Fake Getting Shot

Don't worry, PETA. No animals were hurt or shot in the making of this video. But Keanu Reeves should be worried that his next role might go to one of these cats. Play with sound. ~ p

Spooky Time-Traveling Cell Phone User...Real or Fake?

I don't get scared. I'm not bragging, I just literally don't get creeped out by Halloween movies or gory costumes or, well, anything. Heights can sometimes freak me out. And I'll sometimes 'jump' if you can startle me. But that's about it. Knowing this, to get my adrenaline going, I like unusual, interesting stuff that makes me ask questions, like magic tricks. This video falls into that category.

Irish filmmaker George Clarke created a YouTube video that has gone viral this week. It shows a cellphone-using “time traveler” attending the 1928 premiere of Charlie Chaplin’s The Circus.

I watched it, and it's very convincing. Who knows? It could even be 'real'. But, with that time traveler theory, as I often do, I started to ask questions, like 'Who is on the other end of the phone?', 'How does a cell phone work when cell phone towers haven't been invented yet?', and 'Does her cell phone company charge her for long distance minutes?'

Also interesting is the profession of the guy who 'found' this gem. He's a filmmaker. Is it possible this has been fixed? Likely.

Or maybe, in the words of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, 'When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.'

Take a look and judge for yourself. ~ p

Funny Friday: Dancing is for the Birds

Chalk up another pet that can move much, much better than I can. This bird could teach dance lessons. Or at least, I'd pay to watch it move to different songs so I could pick up a few tips here and there. ~ p 

Funny Friday: Sunny D and Rum Original & 4 of the Best Remakes

Imagine. Stairway to Heaven. Johnny B. Goode. Like a Rolling Stone. There have been many amazing songs in modern music. Now this instant classic has been added to the list: Sunny D and Rum. If you haven't seen it, check out the original first, then move onto some of the best/funniest remakes. ~ p

This version is actually very good...

Worst Commute In The World

When you think you've had a bad day at work, or your commute is too long, or too stressful...think again. ~ p

Funny Friday: Best/Worst Wedding Video Ever

I am getting married next year. We are currently in the 'planning' stage of the wedding...which I'm not sure ends until after you say 'I do'. Anyway, through the process, I've been involved, but in no way have I been in charge. This has been intentional, following the advice of many married men that have come before me. 

Then I watched this video earlier in the week. And now I think that I'm going to take over the entire show. I mean, I'm going to pick the flowers (I only know of two types - easy), write the invitations (I would create a stamp that told people where to be and when, put it on old newspaper, and mail - genius), pick the music (I know a guy), and select the food (burritos go great with beer). I say this because no one, and I mean no one, can screw something up as much as these two did with their wedding video. The only thing they could've have done to make this more ridiculous is jump into matching Pocahontas outfits and danced with a squirrel. I do need to point out that this is the second terrible thing I've seen come out of Russia this week. I wrote earlier about the Twitter Booth...and I think this tops it.



Aside, this is the first Funny Friday that hasn't featured a very talented or overweight animal. But I still have a few more up my sleeve. ~ p

Google vs My Cable Company

I have my beef with Google. They are arrogant, too powerful, and have seemingly ranked customer support as a zero on their importance scale. But here's the thing: My beef with my Cable Company is bigger. Like, feed-a-whole-town-and-an-animal-safari bigger. If Google can give me a way to screw my Cable Company without screwing up my TV watching, sign me up. Well, yesterday, Google gave me hope with the launch of their Google TV mini-site. Here is a video to give you a sense of what to expect with Google TV.



Beside screwing with my Cable Company, there are a lot of things cool about this. Google TV will follow the same format as the Android. Meaning, everyone and their brother can write for it through an open software platform. This will lead to cool apps being developed, like one that will turn your TV into a video phone using devices like Logitech’s Google TV box, the Revue. Other cool features that I can see are:

• Apps for Pandora, Chrome, Twitter, Amazon, Android Gallery
• Major TV networks such as HBO, TNT, TBS, CNN will have a video portal. 
• Fling, play audio or video on your phone on Google TV “with the press of the button.”
• Picture-in-Picture TV watching and web surfing. 
• DVR for video podcasts, and YouTube videos (hopefully TV shows, too)

All I need to see is a Google TV app that will let me watch live sporting events and the deal is done. ~ p 

I Hate Shopping. But I Love this Shopping App.

Here’s the thing. I don’t like shopping. I’m a ‘know what I want before I get there, get it quickly and run the other way’ kind of shopper. Sometimes, though, I am pulled into a shopping bonanza with my sister or my mom. Plus, there is always my once-a-year power-shop in the 24 hours before December 25th. As much as I hate shopping…I can’t completely avoid it. But now, at least my pain and suffering has a kickback.

With a new loyalty app called ‘ShopKick’, I can get relevant offers and earn points to redeem for cool stuff…just for walking into a store. That’s right, you don’t need to buy anything – just walk in. So whether I’m running in to grab something, or I’ve been dragged along with someone else, I will get rewarded. Oh yeah, and if you actually like to shop and do so frequently, this is probably the coolest thing ever.

ShopKick is still in its infancy, and admit they have ‘a lot of work to do,' but they already have some big brands signed on, like Best Buy, Macy’s, and American Eagle. Their founders/employees also seem to have great creds in the mobile space. With enough buzz, this could be a company to look out for. ~ p

Diesel Kicks Ass

A creative person, a client, and a director walk into a bar. The director says, 'These new Diesel shoes are awesome,' while kicking the creative person in the ass. The client says, 'Actually, it appears that Diesel shoes are not just awesome, they also kick ass.'  Bam! A commercial was born. 




I gotta say, it is refreshing to see a brand have fun and take a risk. Companies can forget that their products aren't curing disease or saving lives. Consider this when making next year's marketing plan, 'not always taking yourself so seriously can actually make consumers think more seriously about your product'. ~ p

Funny Friday: Pool-Playing Dog

First, I posted about a dog doing the Merengue. And now this. I'm beginning to think that animals are just better than me at some things. Note to self, do not get hustled by a pool-playing dog this weekend. ~ p

Dog Playing Pool - watch more funny videos

The 200-yard Gong Shot

Could you skim a golf ball 200 yards across a lake and hit a 9-inch gong? Even with some luck, I probably couldn't. As impossible as it sounds, David Howell, Paul McGinley, Marcel Siem or Rhys Davie gave it a try. In recognition of this week's Ryder Cup, enjoy this video. ~ p

Lose Your Wallet. Keep Your Cool.

Jeans got tighter. Cell phones got bigger and smarter. Credit cards, gym cards, video cards, and loyalty cards multiplied like gremlins jumping into a swimming pool. And, with that, the George Costanza wallet no longer fit into our world…or our pants.

It’s sad, but I’ll admit that I’ve lied awake at night ideating ways to stop the ‘let’s give consumers a card for everything’ madness, an alternative that would be safe, practical, and run through my mobile device. Well, apparently a guy named Randy Smith from Aliso Viejo, California couldn’t sleep either, and has been dreaming about a solution since 1996. It took a while, but by George, I think he’s got it.

The company called is MobilePayUSA. In their words, it makes ‘paying for purchases with your mobile phone in the REAL-WORLD…a reality’ (more in the video below). This is awesome news for everyone with a wallet. Bad news for the guy who invented the Visa payment chip. If you're a honcho at a retail or loyalty company, you need to jump on this idea. ~ p 

Office for Mac '11 Overhaul Kills Entourage

It was announced today that Microsoft is launching the Office for Mac 2011 next month on October 26th. The standout line for me in the launch video can be paraphrased as 'Office is something that people feel like they need. We hope this version is something they'll want, too.' After watching the video, I gotta say, it worked. I want it.
 
This overhaul version promises to be a lot faster, and includes cool new aesthetic features, including a new full screen option for Word. It has also dropped the often-frustrating Entourage and opted to include Outlook. For the reasonable price ($120 for a single install and $150 for 3-install Family Pack) it'll get some immediate attention...including from me. ~ p




(Source: Mashable, The Office for Mac Blog)

What's the game plan for Blackberry's Playbook?

The world as I know it has been split into three types of people: Blackberry users, iPhone-ers, and everyone else. I am a hybrid of groups 1 and 2. I use a Blackberry but still have a MacBook, iPod, and an Apple email. With my loyalty of two companies, I’ve been asking myself, what am I going to do once Blackberry’s tablet is in market? That question became a bit more real yesterday.

If you didn’t hear, the Blackberry tablet was officially announced. It will be called Playbook. I’d like to say here that I’m really glad it wasn’t named the often-rumored ‘BlackPad’. With that name, they might as well have called it ‘Our version of the iPad’. Playbook makes me think of a 'game plan'...never a bad thing. Anyway, with little to no true information leaked, it was hard to know what RIM’s, ahem, Playbook was for their new device. Would they go after the business market? Would it have a camera? Why would I want this thing?

That, too, became clearer yesterday. The Playbook seems to have taken all the negative press about the iPad and used it to develop their features. It is 0.4 inches (9.7 mm) thick, making it thinner than the iPad’s 0.5 inches. It will have two cameras, a 5-megapixel one at the back, and a 3-megapixel one at the front. It has a video-recording function. It’s half the weight of iPad, at just 0.9 lbs. It’s flash-friendly, provides multitasking capabilities, and supports 1080p HD video, giving users a ‘full Internet experience’. It also includes an HDMI video output and USB port. To top it off, it’s on a very cool new OS from QNX that promises to be way faster than anything out there. Playbook also adds credibility by targeting the business crowd, as shown in the video below. I mean, if it’s reliable enough to run a presentation, I can count on it to surf the web, right?

The way I see it, this could go two ways. 1) I get excited about all the features iPad doesn’t have and get the new Playbook and be totally happy with the decision, 2) I wait for Stevie Jobs to put his counter move in market with the 2nd generation iPad next year. Not that’s he’s announced his plan to do so…yet. ~ p

(Source: www.wired.com)

BlockBUSTer, How'd You Let This Happen?

There's a scene in Austin Powers, where Austin is driving a steamroller right towards a security guard. He waves, 'Move! Move!' and yells, 'Watch out!', but the security guard is frozen with fear and can only yell, 'STOOOOOOOOOP!!' it what seems to be a last-ditch plea for his life. It is then hilariously revealed that the steamroller is about 50 yards away, giving more time than a snail would need to get out of the way. But he doesn't, and the steamroller keeps going, ultimately right him over. (You can watch the scene again below).

This movie moment came to mind when Blockerbuster filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy last Thursday. Let's be real, we all saw this coming years ago, as did they, but nothing was done to stop it. Instead, they sat back and watched the competition gain strength and power as the video business continued to shift online, and now...here we are. 

Jim Keyes, Blockbuster’s chief executive, said “After a careful and thorough analysis, we determined that the process announced today provides the optimal path for recapitalizing our balance sheet and positioning Blockbuster for the future as we continue to transform our business model to meet the evolving preferences of our customers." 

So...the transformation starts now? Seriously? I gotta admit, for the past few years, I thought Blockbuster had something secretly cooking. I mean, this was Blockbuster! They were the only game in town in most towns. There was no way they were going to let Netflix and Co. take over the show. But that's exactly what just happened. 

As a place that's given me tons of great memories, as much as I would like to, I can't feel any remorse for Blockbuster. They had lots of time to move their business model out of the way of the proverbial steamroller and shift service online...but, instead, they just let it roll right over them. ~ p  

An Unsubscribe Tactic that Might Work

Many companies try to convince you to stay on their email lists by flashing 'limited-time offers' and 'last chance opportunities' in your face as you are trying to leave. Personally, I don't think they work. If I'm unsubscribing, it's because I've seen little value in the service, and convincing me otherwise with offers and savings just makes me wonder why I wasn't given those to begin with. Anyway, a colleague of mine recently tried to unsubscribe from Groupon, a great online site that gives you daily coupons for stuff in your city. She was already signed up for another site with the same offering and didn't want two of the same thing. While she was trying to unsubscribe, a video appeared on her screen with the message, 'We're sorry to see you go. How sorry? Well, we want to introduce you to Derek. He's the guy that thought you'd enjoying receiving the Daily Groupon email.' She was then asked to 'Punish Derek'. And, when she clicked the button, as you can see in the video below, Derek is punished. Playing off your guilt, Groupon says that you can make up for what you just did to Derek by staying on their email list. Good on Groupon! This tactic is funny, different, cool, and it just might work. ~ p 

Fat Cat in a Small Pot

I grew up with cats, so I know they like being hidden away in blankets, boxes, shoes, laundry baskets, etc. But I've never seen a fat cat try to hide in a small pot... 

Attempt #1



Attempt #2


~ p 

Tom Lehrer's Instant Elements

To end a week full of Instant, this is one for all of the scientists out there. And, really, for anyone who ever took a science class. I tell ya, if this video existed when I was a kid, it would've been a lot easier to...oh wait, I should really wait another 10 years before I start pulling that line out. Enjoy. ~ p